I have been a victim of workplace bullying. I lost confidence in myself, and was fired. Then I found a job in a public administration. I work near my home and see my children more. People are nice, but the work is not exciting and I do not blossom professionally. I recently did a skills assessment and the consultant advised me a psychoanalysis. Is it really effective for me to regain self-confidence? Arnaud, 37
It seems that your suffering is related to the fact that you feel "dispossessed" of your choices. The direction of your professional life is dictated by circumstances, by your family, by a supervisor who harasses you and fires you, by reason, by the sense of paternal duty, but never by your personal desire. You speak of "sacrifice": it is a very strong word. Where do you get this feeling of sacrificing yourself for others and suffering the vagaries of your destiny?
This is what it would be good to question in psychotherapy in order to become master of the game again. It is certain that psychoanalysis helps to find one's own desire. It achieves this by highlighting this truth: it is neither the external constraints nor the others that make us suffer and block us but rather inner constraints, those of our unconscious. Becoming aware of one's unconscious desires, impulses, and fantasies allows the analysand to get out of the usual patterns and regain freedom of action. Changing so deeply is not done in three months!
A psychoanalysis represents a heavy investment of time, energy, will and money and the essential condition for its good progress is to make the decision yourself. Coming to psychoanalysis on the advice of a consultant does not seem a good indication. What is your goal? To read, you want to become competitive and enterprising professionally in a minimum of time. You want to act on certain behaviors, your aims are more practical than in-depth and you want concrete and fast results.
In this case, it is better to undertake a short psychotherapy in individual or group type behavioral therapy, NLP, Gestalt therapy, transactional analysis ... An internship of assertiveness or personal development, or even a coach could also you be useful. The coaching is there to accompany the change, it is even its main vocation.First of all, it is necessary to take stock of past blockages and failures, then to find new dynamism and new potentialities. A coach is a tool to move from dissatisfaction to "doing better".